Girl’s guide to journaling
Whenever I bring up the fact that I journal, I’ve noticed many fall into the “I should really do that” crowd. You can! Journaling is nothing special, and reframing the task can shift your mental barriers surrounding it.
Journaling is releasing.
It’s the exact same catharsis as thinking through a problem, talking to a friend, or your therapist. You don’t even have to call it journaling if that’s blocking you. Call it jotting down your thoughts, brain untangling - call yourself a life-historian. Whatever works for your self concept.
Journaling as self devotion is a choice, not a pressure-filled task.
Journaling isn’t the end-all-be-all, and it shouldn’t be treated as such. It’s simply another tool to access your inner world. Take the pressure off and see it as a form of self devotion, or “me time”, and don’t do it on days you don’t feel called to. Reframed this way, it becomes way easier to grab a notebook and start scribbling away. Zero stakes involved!
Who says you have to write words?
The real benefit of journaling comes from regularly tuning into yourself, and getting familiar withthis state of tuning in. This is an internal practice that has nothing to do with external by-products (how much you wrote, what you wrote, how long you spent writing).
So, to be honest, you don’t even need words. On days you can’t muster up coherent sentences… don’t write! Doodle, color, draw 1000 dots, meditate, cry. As long as you’re making space for yourself, you’re doing it!
Ditch the date and draw a star ⭐️
In middle and high school, I viewed journaling as a way to create an elaborate time capsule for 80 year-old me, because my biggest fear was forgetting my life when i got old. In an attempt to record every minuscule detail, I began each entry with the month, date, year, time, and day of the week. Even as my approach to journaling evolved over time, this habit never changed.
A couple years ago, I finally questioned why I write in my journal. I wasn’t writing to record keep anymore (thank god), I was writing to unburden my feelings and understand myself better. Why even bother with the date, then? The self-imposed shame I had about all the time that had elapsed between journal entries kept from from writing even MORE.
So I tried ditching dates entirely and started new entries with a hand drawn star ⭐️ Stars are fun to draw and it gets my pen moving right away! This simple change has made picking up my notebook effortless - who knew?!
ALL THIS TO SAY - the solution can be as simple as drawing a star!! Maybe for you it’s brewing your special tea with journal time, or a simple habit tracker with stickers, or setting a 5 minute timer. I encourage you to identify your weird block and work around it!
The right journal isn’t always fancy… any scrap of paper can become a journal entry.
I used to be a fancy journal girly but i’ve done a complete 180. My current journal is a thin green notebook from Daiso and it only costed $1.75. It lets me focus more on writing than the act of writing, if that makes sense.
I recommend trying both fancy and casual notebooks to see what works best for you. The best notebook is the one you use. It also helps to have many notebooks with different purposes to build writing and journaling into your life!
My notebooks:
Tiny pink purse notebook → thoughts on-the-go
Skinny blue notebook → book reviews
Plain and unlined notebooks → for all the times i “need a piece of paper” (I use these the most)
Notes app → when my brain is thinking faster than I can write by hand
What is stopping you? Answer honestly.
“I don’t think my life is interesting enough.”
“I feel like I can’t be honest, even when I write, because someone might read it.”
“I know I should journal, and I want to start, but I just don’t.”
“I never know what to write about.”
“Writing is hard.”
“I feel like I’m fine without journaling.”
“I’m afraid of what I’ll write.”
Do any of these ring true to you? Sometimes there’s days where you just don’t feel like journaling. But if you find yourself with a huge mental block, these hesitations may reveal limiting beliefs if you dig a little deeper.
“My life isn’t interesting enough.” → Journaling is not a performance. Where does this belief, that you must be interesting even in the privacy of your own mind, stem from? Who are you performing for, and why?
“I feel like I can’t be honest, even when I write, because someone might read it.” → Write on a scrap piece of paper and burn it afterwards. The point of journaling is to release thoughts and feelings; it’s not necessary to keep them around. If you’re willing to go deeper, investigate where this feeling is coming from and who/what could’ve planted this distrust inside you. Do you find yourself monitoring yourself? Who does this serve?
“I know I should journal, and I want to start, but I just don’t.” → Imagine you’re on a rainy hike and your feet are wet, cold, and starting to form blisters. You forgot to pack extra socks but your friend offers you a fresh pair (let’s say they brought five extra pairs so it wouldn’t affect them at all). Would you say no? Of course not. The dry socks benefit you whether you like it or not. Journaling is the same! You’d survive just fine without it, but life is a lot less confusing when you’re working with your subconscious mind… not against it.
For those who would deny themselves the fresh pair of socks, I invite you to examine why that is.
Is it because your friend shouldn’t “waste a pair” on you? Examine your feelings around self worth. They brought FIVE pairs - it’s no burden, and they want to help. You deserve to have dry feet as much as anyone else, so WHY not? Is it because you’re willing to “tough it out”? Why, when there’s a solution right in front of your face? Where else do you deprive yourself of ease in your life? What core beliefs drive you to self-flagellate? Why do you believe you deserve less than bare minimum? Is it more comfortable to stay in denial about your needs? Is it hard to admit you need help from others?“I never know what to write about.” → It doesn’t matter what you write, it matters that you just write. Start by writing down everything that happened in your day, whether you think it mattered or not. As you write, you’ll find yourself injecting your subjective thoughts about objective happenings.
“Writing is hard.” → Like everything in life, writing gets a little easier every time you do it. If this is your excuse, how else are you keep yourself back from your fullest potential in your life? Why do you let a little friction intimidate your growth? If you really dislike the physical act of writing, try a different form of stream-of-consciousness (like daily voice memos!)
“I feel like I’m fine without journaling.” → Sometimes I go months without journaling (I call it living life “raw”) and think i’m completely fine. But when I eventually do, it’s like opening a dam. I always finish with a thought along the lines of, “holy shit, I didn’t know that was all inside me.” If you do the daily maintenance, you will be rewarded. But I get it, sometimes it’s just not the vibe and that’s okay.
“I’m afraid of what I’ll write.” → You probably need to write more than anyone else reading this. Those fears are not yours, they’re what you’ve been told to fear - and whatever you’re afraid of is directly connected to your most exciting expansion. When you integrate all parts of you, even the parts you may “hate” or fear at this moment, you become impervious to what everyone else wants or thinks about you. That’s radical self love! <3
I’m pretty passionate about the benefits of journaling, if you couldn’t tell. Wishing you an extra dose of self love today!